A City of Strangers

Stephen Sondheim wrote the following lyrics in his musical comedy Company, referring to how people in New York City could seem like complete strangers. "It's a city of strangers / Some come to work, some to play. / A city of strangers / Some come to stare, some to stay / And every day / The ones who stay / Can find each other in the crowded streets and the guarded parks..." Those lyrics have been lingering in my head for the past several days, which is making me realize that everyone in New York is a stranger, although it may not seem that way because we ride the subway or walk down the same avenues, but in fact we are strangers.

In a city where we're all on time schedule, heading towards a certain destination, how does one connect with another person? The connection that I'm talking about isn't a romantic one, but more on the friendship level. How does someone befriend an adult? I've been trying to figure that out every since I arrived.

It's not like it was when we where in the third grade when all it took to become friends with someone was as simple as just asking, "do you want to be friends?" And the reply was always the same, "Sure." When we were kids we weren't guarded or jaded. We said what was on our minds and we didn't apologize for it. I long for those days. The simpler days. The days when text messages weren't the only way to communicate with friends. The days when hanging out meant exactly that, hanging out; there wasn't a double meaning behind the phrase. 

I was on the subway a few weeks ago, I didn't have my iPOD with me and so I just sat there. In one of the stops two gay guys strolled in laughing. They sat across from me and I was instantly intrigued by them, so I did what any normal person would do in my iPOD-less situation, I ease-dropped. I believe they noticed and I don't think they cared. One had a killer laugh and the other a cute body; at one point they began talking about New York real estate, the one with the cute body was cracking jokes about the market and the one with the killer laugh was filling the subway car with his laugh. I too was chuckling. I felt like I had known both them for years. And that's when it dawned on me; I wanted to be friends with these two guys. But I nipped that crazy idea in the bud when the insecure voice in my heard started saying, "they're going to laugh in your face," or "their friend card is already filled." So I didn't say anything and watched them get off the train two stops before I was. 

This happened several weeks ago and I wished I had said something, because they both seem like great guys who I could've been friends with. If I ever see them on the subway again, I will make sure that we're not strangers because I will ask them if they want to be my friend and hope their reply is, "sure."