I Could Have Danced All Night

I've had a love hate relationship with the gay scene ever since I came out almost ten years ago. It's always the same scenario; the same boys with the same trendy clothes, the same music playing, the same expensive drinks, nothing's new-but yet I still go. I'm like a moth to a flame attracted to the scene. Why do I go back, week after week? Why do we all go back, week after week?  What's the force that attracts all of us to the club? It's not the expensive drinks, it's not the loud music, could it be the go-go boys or the cute shirtless bartender?  Maybe. But it has to be more than that. I wonder how long will this last? Can I continue doing this when I'm thirty-five, or let's say forty. Hopefully by then I'll be in a long-term relationship and I won't have to worry about going to the club, but what if I'm not that long-term relationship. I do have friends who are in their late thirties, early forties, who are single and they go to the club week after week. I just don't see myself doing that. I just can't.  

For me the reason that I go to the club has always been the hope that I could potentially meet that great guy. I know it sounds ludicrous to think that I could meet someone at a club, but I have friends who that's happen to.  

Anyone who's ever been to the club, knows how things work. Around two in the morning,  like clockwork, most of us begin scoping out all the guys. To figure out who were going to go to bed with. I'm not saying it's a good or bad thing, because sex with a stranger can be really hot, once in awhile, but it gets old when you're looking for something more substantial than that. It also comes with the territory, Las Vegas is a very transient city, just last night I was out with my friends and we met a guy who's name escapes me right now, but he was from Amsterdam, so we called him "Amsterdam" the rest of the night, and I could tell that he really wanted to get laid. I'm pretty sure he did get lucky; he was good-looking guy with a cute body and had a thick accent, which was hard to understand through the loud pounding music.

I wonder can you really find something that will surpass a one-night only at the club? At this point in my life, the cynical me, says no. But I could be completely wrong.

Getting back to last night, I had the best time with my friends. It was amazing because we were all there enjoying each other's companies, dancing the night away, getting a little drunk, not really looking to hook-up. At least for me, that's when I have the best time; when I'm there to enjoy myself. If I start paroling then it turns out to be a horrible night. But not last night, last night was one of those nights when you look back you remember how great it was. Two of my close friends were not present because they were working, but they were there in spirit.

I'm really thankful that I have these boys in my life. This is what I've always wanted, and it really saddens me that I'm going to have to leave them when I partake on my next adventure. When I finally get what I've always wanted I'm going to lose it. I know I'm being a little melo-dramatic right now, but my hope is that we'll always be in each other's life. But only time will tell.

Vegas Boys: (from L-R) Richard, Oscar, Mike, Jason, Robert, Rob, & Ace.